Tonight on “Conversations With Small Children”… we find ourselves at local Ice Cream parlor where the two small girls have requested a double scoop cone.The parents acquiesce remembering the small two scoop cones of their day, prior to modern super-sizing of all things food related.
We fast forward through some dialogue and arrive at the inevitable moment when the sugar rampages through the bodies of the small children and completely takes control.
At which point the older of the two children applies the partially finished cone to her forehead and declares loudly from beneath the sticky veil of chocolate that shrouds her face… “I’M A UNICORN!!!” Laughter erupts from the table and the parents look at each other in utter disbelief. While the rest of the patrons in the store try to stifle their giggling.
During the drive home the parents contemplate whether this would be an appropriate circumstance in which to call 911 and the conversation that might have followed…
“911… what’s your emergency.”
“My child has overdosed.”
“Sir… calm down… can you tell me what they have taken?”
“YES! SUGAR… AND LOTS OF IT!”
The parents decide that this might not be taken seriously and put the idea from their minds. About 4 minutes from the house they decide that the only course of action possible is to threaten the children with immediate shipment to Abu Dhabi…
OR… a bath and a one way ticket to bed as well as being cut off from that amount of ice cream for the rest of forever.
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